Saturday, March 26, 2011

Letter to our Dogs!

Letter To The Dog
 And all of us, who understand that with love comes the sacrifice of certain things, including privacy, sanity and carpets.

I love you!

I really do.
You are my light, my life and my ray of sunshine on the cloudiest day.

There are a few things you should know, though.

The toilet will NOT pull me in, and there is no secret exit from the bathroom. I do not need you to guard me when I go to the bathroom.

I can finish an entire meal, without your help. I promise!

I put your food in a bowl, because you weren't raised in a barn and I want your food clean, healthy and free of disease, you do not need to spread it all over the floor, before you eat it.

I truly value that you want to share with me, but please, do not share your dead rabbit, bird, rodent, opossum, chicken or other 'little critters' with me at 3 in the morning.
And do not hide them for later, they won't be there.

I do not require you to bring me water in your mouth. You do not need to dribble water on my face, my lap, my head, my legs or my arms. Nor do you need to spit a mouthful of water in my lap, while I am on the toilet. If I want water, I can fill the glass. I do NOT need you to bring me water, just because you drink from the toilet and I am currently sitting on it.

I do not need your slimy cow hoof or rawhide in the bed, I can sleep just fine without chewing on something, even if you can't.The bed, it is NOT a trampoline.
I do not need you to roll your brother/sister on my back, it does not substitute for a massage.

I am sleeping. I do not need you to investigate my face, kiss me, groom me or walk on my hair to know you are there. I feel you in my heart all the time.
I understand that you want to sleep under the covers. It is not necessary to dig me out from under the covers, to alert me to the fact that you want under the blankies.

Pick a blanket and get under it.
There is NO blanket monster, it really is my hand. After 5 years, I think you would know this. It does NOT need to die, be dug out from under the blankets or have your teeth wrapped around it or your claws in it.

If I wanted the bed moved, I would move it. Ramming your brother or sister full speed into the bed, is not the way we move furniture.

The couch and love seat are OURS. We share it. You do not have to sit on my head when I sit on the love seat. There is room for both of us. It is not necessary to sit on my lap, the moment I sit down. You weigh 60 pounds, or more, depending on which one of you it is. I need to get my breath before you sit on me.I do require oxygen to live. Your snout in my mouth is not a source of oxygen.

The couch, like the bed, IS NOT a trampoline.

You get dirty, I understand that. You enjoy being dirty.
You do not need to wipe your feet on my leg.
You do not need to step on my feet with your, to show me how dirty you are.
Believe me, I know you are a mud wallering piglet.
I love you, dirt and all.
I understand that the carpet will never be same color again.
I realize you believe muddy foot prints on the floor are works of art, so do I!
I don't believe they need to be shared with my lap.

"Talking" to me is part of your nature.
I understand this. I talk to you. I sing to you. I howl to you, mostly to watch you try to howl. Talking to me, an hour after I get in bed, is NOT necessary. You can tell me when we get up. Telling me the whole story the moment I walk in the house is GREAT, telling me the whole story in the middle of the night, is not!

The great outdoors, is great!!! We both love it.
I do not need to hear about the leaf that drifted across the yard.
The bird that landed in your yard, does not require a call to arms for the entire house.
The noisy truck driving down the road, is not an imminent danger.
The car that pulled into our driveway might be.

I realize the meter reader is your friend. You think he's great. You talk to him. He likes you. Great! I'm glad you don't think he should die! I'm sure he does too. I do not need you to run in and out the dog door in a frenzy, alerting 3 counties to the fact that the meter reader came to see you and he has treats!

Speaking of the dog door, it is there, because I think you need to pee when I'm not right there. I know that sometimes... "holding it" isn't an option.
It is not a revolving door. It is not there so you can admire the great outdoors, while keeping your ass warm as cute as it is.
When you go out the dog door, take your entire body with you, this includes your tail. We are not heating or cooling the entire world. *(now I know what my mother meant about the door)
Three of you will never fit through the dog door at the same time. Even if it amusing to watch... Your sister is getting older, it is not fun to trap her outside in a storm. Back up and let her in the dog door, she can't come in, while you're standing with your shoulders through the dog door.

Finally, Personal space is just that, personal.
My boobs are not a step to help you get further in my face.

I brush my teeth, with a toothbrush, your tongue is not for cleaning my mouth.

I do not need my eyeballs licked, ever.

I appreciate your tender loving care, but I use a kleenex to blow my nose, not your tongue.

I do love your kisses but can you limit the French kissing..

I assure you, nothing has changed since the last time I changed clothes, I do not need supervision and the clothing does not eat me.

If I am on the toilet, there is nothing to investigate. I let you go to the bathroom by yourself, please let me. If I am watching you go, there is a reason for it. I will not run up and stick my nose in your business.

Dad pays attention to you the minute he walks in the door and so do I.

We both love you kiss you and pet you. Just because we pay attention to each other does not mean we have forgotten you are there. We do not need help to give each other a kiss. And your Dad touching me, is in no way an affront to the attention he gives you.

We love you, like no other. Each and every one of you is special to us, in your own special way.

We will always share our home, our couch, our bed and our food.

We will always make sure you have what you need to be healthy, happy and well adjusted.

We will always make time for you, even when there isn't any.

We put you first in our lives and look after you each and every day before we look after ourselves... Ok ok Dad gets his coffee first but I don't, I look after you before anything..

We will always find the money to fix it, even when we don't have it.

We will always make sure your belly is full, even if it means ours aren't.

We will always be grateful you came into our lives. Even when you leave us.

But, please understand, if I tell you it will take a minute, it will take a minute, if you try to help me? It will take 3 times longer!!!!

If I tell you it's time for bed, it's time for bed, not time to wrestle!

If I tell you I love you, it means I'll give you everything of me, just like I know you will give me all of you.

You're my light, my life and my love.

Now, seriously, shut up and go to sleep!

Friday, March 4, 2011

Upcoming Vacation

Well it is almost that time, and I so need a vacation. We are heading to Cozumel on the 9th of March for two weeks. Emma is coming with is and we are meeting Maddie, Steven, Desmond and Danika in Toronto and flying down to Coz together. Then on the 12th Angie, Steven and Aselin are coming for a week.
It will be so good to have the whole family together in such a lovely place.. 
I get to see the grandkids all in one place.. 

The pups are going to the pet sitter and even though I feel guilty about leaving them I know they will be well looked after. Raider is finally doing better, no diarrhea in over a week, the new food seems to have done the trick. Will still keep him on the antibiotics while we are gone just to be safe.

Work has been absolutely crazy busy and I so need a break. 5 Sleeps!!!